A question beats an assertion

The strongest move in most arguments is a question with a real cost behind it.

Asserting makes them defend. Asking makes them think. 'What would you cut instead?' 'What would change your mind?' 'And then what happens?' A good question is an argument the other person has to make for you.

Instead of

That'll never work in practice.

Try

Walk me through year two — what happens when the funding runs out?

Try it today

Replace one assertion today with the question it was hiding.

The science

Chris Voss (Never Split the Difference, 2016): calibrated 'how' and 'what' questions make the other side solve your problem. Socratic questioning is the two-thousand-year-old version.

Where you'd actually use it

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Knowing it and doing it are different skills.

FlowTalk drops you into the argument where "a question beats an assertion" is the thing that saves you — and judges what you actually said.

Make your case — free